Recently we moved into our brand new house. Yes it is beautiful and fresh and smells like a newly laid wooden floor mixed with a bit of dog because the teenage son seems to not quite understand the term 'outside dog'. I have given up trying to teach the boy new tricks and I have to say the dog is a faster learner. However, my son loves his dog and the dog is in love with him. It's pretty sickening to be honest, but the whole affair is very cute and who am I to get between a man and his dog. When they use the term 'a dog is mans best friend' I would have to agree going on the empirical evidence witnessed in my home. The good news is that we are finally beginning to settle down.
I can't believe that I have a home. I have lived all over Western Australia throughout my adult life and I have not regretted any of it. All of the places that I have experienced with my children holds a special place in my heart and my memories are nothing but happy ones. However to finally settle down in one place and in such a beautiful home is a bit daunting for this little black chic from the bush.
When I first moved into this house I felt guilty. Yes folks I felt guilty. I felt guilty because I thought of all of my friends and family who are living a less successful life and maybe not living in such beauty as I am lucky to be experiencing today. It has taken me a while to get over this feeling and to allow myself to come to love my home. In fact it has been a bit of a learning experience. I feel proud, happy and overawed all at the same time. I am humbled that I have achieved such beauty. I had no idea that owning a home could be so rewarding emotionally not just for me but for my children. I love the fact that I can relax and do what I like in my home whenever I want. There is freedom in debt. Of course there is another downside to owning a home apart from the financial constraints and that is the work required to make it aesthetically appealing.
Obviously being a new house there is much work to be done. The first thing to settling down is to unpack your boxes of 'stuff'. Slowly I have sifted through my boxes of stored goodies that have not seen the light of day over the past 4 years and have come to the realisation that I don't need any of it. In fact I have thrown most of it away. I have kept a couple of items that carry sentimental value however the rest has gone. This purging of material objects with little meaning has become quite insightful and it has me thinking about the way in which we as human beings seem to think we need to acquire 'things'. We don't need the majority of 'things' that we collect and today I went through the last box that needed purging because brotherboy was doing a tip run and I did not want to miss the trailer. I have to say it felt good. In fact I feel extremely happy. My happiness is not because I purged the box of 'stuff' but because in this last box I unearthed a long lost treasure.
About 8 years ago I purchased a book of poetry and short stories titled 'The Business of Fancy Dancing' written by Sherman Alexie. I thought I had lost this book that I love and I was contemplating ordering another copy when it did not appear in any of the book boxes that I had previously unpacked. I purchased this book online because I could not get a copy here in Australia. Alexie is an American Indian and writes the funniest stories about life on the reservation. Alexie also highlights what it is that he views as important in life. I love his work and it always makes me smile when I read it. Unearthing this book and releasing 'The Business of Fancy Dancing' into my home has given me joy. I know its weird but I have been reading poetry from this book all day today and it is resounding off the walls of this house and into the ears of my children despite the fact that they are not in the same room as me as I recite. It feels good to let this go, to feel such emotion from words that express the journey of life. Words that remind me of what life is really about. This is important to me because living in this beautiful home means that I could easily forget the real things in life and get caught up in material gain.
'The Business of Fancy Dancing' made me realise that I don't need a whole lot of 'stuff'. What I do need is nourishment for the soul and I hope that I will not forget this as I experience the pride and joy of owning a home.
So in this beautiful house which by the way is limited in the furniture department because I have so much space in here that I do not want to fill it up and lose the space that we have, I am being reminded to remain humble and accept the gifts of the universe with gratitude.
In saying that I would like to share with you one of my favourite Alexie poems:
Indian Boy Love Song (#1)
Everyone I have lost
in the closing of a door
the click of the lock
is not forgotten, they
do not die but remain
within the soft edges
of the earth, the ash
of house fires and cancer
in sin and forgiveness
huddled under old blankets
dreaming their way into my hands, my heart
closing tight like fists
By: Sherman Alexie
Life is good!
