The First Day

It's the first day of the New Year and I am actually feeling positive. It's amazing. The last couple of months of 2010 dragged by turning into long days, and nights, and I ended up with a little burn out I think. Well not think, I know I ended up with burn out because my brain slowed right down and turned to mush and my body slid to a screaming halt and my emotions ran away leaving me totally numb. Yep burn out, thats what I had. Don't you find it amazing how you just keep on going, knowing that you really need a rest but you ignore all the warning signs and push yourself to the limit. I love my job, but I was seriously beginning to feel tired, so I just kept going focusing on the 20th December because that was the beginning of my holidays and I was so looking forward to it. A well earned rest that's what I needed. 

My holidays took their time in coming but finally, the last day of work arrived and here I am. Up until now I have been busy with christmas and personal responsibilities but at last, here I am, actually on holidays. Today is the first day of my holidays that I don't have to do anything. I have not gone anywhere, I have read a book, watched a movie, entertained my grand daughter, cooked dinner for all, and I managed to wash the dishes after dinner. I even loaded my new kayak into my car because I am going for a row in the morning. Yes I brought myself a new kayak for christmas. Its an up grade to a slimmer racier kayak. I have already taken it for a spin on the Denmark river and I have to say I really like it. Much better than my first kayak. And to top off the good cheer I actually feel really well. It's amazing. The first day of the New Year and I am feeling as though it is a new beginning. It's a bit weird because it has been so unexpected and my life up to this point has been full speed with no hand brake so coming to a screeching halt had me out of sorts.

So, why you ask am I feeling so positive, relaxed and just plain good? I have absolutely no idea. Now you thought I had an answer for that one, but I don't. I just feel that the heaviness of the end of 2010 has disappeared with the ringing of the bells and the lighting of the fireworks that coloured the night sky and  saw in the New Year. I feel blessed. I spent New Years Eve partying with my cousin. We did not drink, but we danced away the night and part of the morning. We caught up with some of our other cousins who just happened to be at the same venue, and we socialised with strangers. All in all we had a really good night and morning and then we went home sober and feeling great. Of course once we climbed into the car the two old girls crumbled physically. My cousin started holding her leg, going ouch, ouch, ouch. I was in the driver's seat, so I leaned over, looked at her sombrely, asking quietly, 'are you okay, do I need to take you to a hospital?' She just looked at me with eyes wide and we both cracked up laughing. My cousin suffers from soreness in her legs and dancing all night and part of the morning aggravated her condition. And I realise that may not be funny to most people but we have a very wicked sense of humour my cousin and I. In between fits of laughter she said 'I know I'm going to regret this tomorrow, but I had so much fun'.  

I on the other hand had on a very nice pair of fashionable black heels that where killing my toes which were begging for release from their confinement. I took my shoes off slowly, opened the door of the car, stretched my legs out and flexed my poor aching toes. Pain seared across the base of my foot however my toes breathed in a sigh of relief. Lesson learned make sure I buy dancing shoes in future. Heels that are lower to the ground and comfortable. My toes took about 10 minutes of flexing and breathing before the pain left me and in between my cousin's ouch every couple of minutes and our raucous banter I was finally feeling as though I may be able to put my foot on the accelerator. I turned around closed the door, took one look at my cousin and said 'okay, I am ready'. Once again laughter lit up the vehicle because honestly we are way to old to be partying and dancing the night away and thinking that we will not suffer the physical ills of the mature aged body. On the way home we continued to laugh as we recalled the fun of the evening. After dropping of my cousin I drove home arriving at the wee hours of the morning and feeling as if the burdens of 2010 had lifted from my shoulders. Not thinking much of this newfound feeling of freedom I went to bed and arose way after noon. Interestingly this feeling of newness, if you like, has stayed with me. And I have to say it feels good.

On the first day of the New Year a couple of things have eventuated. Firstly, I am an early riser, so sleeping until after noon is not my usual style. And I felt good about it. Secondly, this afternoon one of my girlfriends sent me a text message asking if I would like to have breakfast on the South Perth foreshore tomorrow morning. Initially I said 'no' because I was planning on rowing down south tomorrow, so I suggested next Sunday instead. She text me back to say she was not free next Sunday. So I suggested tonight at her place for a bbq dinner. She text me back saying 'no can do, others where set to go for this Sunday morning'. By this time I was over the text messaging and I was curious by her comment of 'others', so I phoned for a quick chat and more information. Turns out she has organised for some of our mutual friends to have breakfast on the South Perth foreshore and she had asked one of her new single male friends to come along to meet me. All this without telling me first. My reaction in the past to this piece of information would have been, bad luck I'm going rowing. But seeing as I am having a fantastic feeling of 'new beginnings' I decided to say 'yes' to the breakfast because to be honest I am totally unsociable at the best of times and I do way too many things on my own. And my burn out had created some un-wellness in my body which I am only now recuperating from. So my New Years resolution, which I made last night is to change my bad habits to create new energy within my life. And guess what it is already working. 

I feel energised, positive and excited that a New Year is upon me. A new beginning, a new start. Let go of the old and bring in the new. Sounds good doesn't it. But.....some old habits are hard to break, so before breakfast I will be on the Swan river rowing, enjoying the sweet breath of early morning before the 'others' get there....lol

Life is good.